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Help[Opinions] Re: Hulda
in reply to a message by Billina
It's a way to pretend that you're going to mean something to strangers after you die
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I would consider naming a child after an ancestor I never knew, but I don't pretend that I will mean anything to my descendants after I die. I may or may not mean anything to them, and I may mean something to some of them and nothing to some of them, and after enough time goes by, it's highly unlikely I'll mean anything to any of them. I don't care about that. That's not important to me. What's important to me is that my descendants will never have existed if it weren't for me. That is my immortality. And I would never think of any future descendants as strangers. They will all be my grandchildren, my great-grandchildren, my great-great-grandchildren, add as many greats as you want. They will be my children.
Right now I wish I'd had more children.
Right now I wish I'd had more children.
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Or not.
I like history. I love connecting to the past. Walk into my apartment and you'll see that right away - just about everything in my apartment is used or has sentimental meaning. Using Hulda as a middle name is pure sentimentality. It's part of who I am, and part of who my husband is. My child will grow up knowing who she is named after and being told stories about her, which is fine. My niece is named Mary after her mother who was named after her grandmother who was named after her mother and none of them went/go by Mary - it's just traditional to use Mary. With us it's traditional to use family names. I like the feeling that the names tie my child to our family's past. If our child grows up to be totally non-sentimental and gives our grandchild the name Kalamazoo I won't care - it will reflect his/her values and beliefs. (Although I would find it silly.)
What a parent chooses to name their child reflects on their beliefs, values and ideals. It's an intensely private moment that shouldn't be judged. One of my brothers spelled out his name, another gave each of his children a name from a book. My sister-in-law named her son after her father who died when she was 2. Another person I know named their child after Yeats. My father insists that my middle name (Elizabeth) means woman of God's house, not God's solemn oath. It's so important to him that I don't bother correcting him anymore, it's what he wanted in my name. And therefore, he got it.
If it bothers people that I'm naming my child after my great-grandmother, so be it. I think it's silly that my brother spelled out his name with his children's initials, but I respect his right to do it.
I like history. I love connecting to the past. Walk into my apartment and you'll see that right away - just about everything in my apartment is used or has sentimental meaning. Using Hulda as a middle name is pure sentimentality. It's part of who I am, and part of who my husband is. My child will grow up knowing who she is named after and being told stories about her, which is fine. My niece is named Mary after her mother who was named after her grandmother who was named after her mother and none of them went/go by Mary - it's just traditional to use Mary. With us it's traditional to use family names. I like the feeling that the names tie my child to our family's past. If our child grows up to be totally non-sentimental and gives our grandchild the name Kalamazoo I won't care - it will reflect his/her values and beliefs. (Although I would find it silly.)
What a parent chooses to name their child reflects on their beliefs, values and ideals. It's an intensely private moment that shouldn't be judged. One of my brothers spelled out his name, another gave each of his children a name from a book. My sister-in-law named her son after her father who died when she was 2. Another person I know named their child after Yeats. My father insists that my middle name (Elizabeth) means woman of God's house, not God's solemn oath. It's so important to him that I don't bother correcting him anymore, it's what he wanted in my name. And therefore, he got it.
If it bothers people that I'm naming my child after my great-grandmother, so be it. I think it's silly that my brother spelled out his name with his children's initials, but I respect his right to do it.
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My answer was more directed at finding the root of that "sentimentality." I mean I respect people's right to it and all.
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Okay, I understand.
I actually believe that you do leave part of yourself when you die - at least the way you affected other people. IDK - it's an interesting concept of what is left behind and what isn't left behind, whether or not your life mattered to strangers. I don't much care if I leave a mark with strangers but I hope my family remembers at least part of me. (Although I know that at about 100 years I'll be nothing but a tombstone.)
I actually believe that you do leave part of yourself when you die - at least the way you affected other people. IDK - it's an interesting concept of what is left behind and what isn't left behind, whether or not your life mattered to strangers. I don't much care if I leave a mark with strangers but I hope my family remembers at least part of me. (Although I know that at about 100 years I'll be nothing but a tombstone.)
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Very well said.
I'm afraid I'm coming off like a butthole in this thread, though. Again, these are just my opinions, and I don't think it's a bad thing if people do this. It's just always seemed like a strange and distorted thing to me.
I'm afraid I'm coming off like a butthole in this thread, though. Again, these are just my opinions, and I don't think it's a bad thing if people do this. It's just always seemed like a strange and distorted thing to me.
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