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Help[Opinions] Love the names, but not the nicknames
I love these names, but just not the nicknames.
Would there be a way to avoid this or will James always be called Jim, Jimmy or Jamey.
Here are a few of the names:
Andrew - nn Andy or Drew
James - nn Jim, Jimmy or Jamey
Joseph - nn Joey or Joe
Edward - nn Ed or Eddie
Kenneth, Kendrick, Kenrick - nn Ken or Kenny (for Kendrick or Kenrick I would like Kenry as nn)
Penelope - nn Penny
Adelaide - nn Ada or Addy (I do like Adele or Alice as a nn for Adelaide)
With other names I like the nicknames.
Finley - nn Finn
Tobiah - nn Toby
Benjamin, Benedict - nn Ben, Benji
Thaddeus - nn Thad or Tad
Abigail - nn Abby
Matthew - nn Matt
What's your opinion, avoid the names, or just accept the fact that, eventhough you don't like it, everybody will call your child Penny (*yuk*) instead of the gorgeous name Penelope you loved so much.
Would there be a way to avoid this or will James always be called Jim, Jimmy or Jamey.
Here are a few of the names:
Andrew - nn Andy or Drew
James - nn Jim, Jimmy or Jamey
Joseph - nn Joey or Joe
Edward - nn Ed or Eddie
Kenneth, Kendrick, Kenrick - nn Ken or Kenny (for Kendrick or Kenrick I would like Kenry as nn)
Penelope - nn Penny
Adelaide - nn Ada or Addy (I do like Adele or Alice as a nn for Adelaide)
With other names I like the nicknames.
Finley - nn Finn
Tobiah - nn Toby
Benjamin, Benedict - nn Ben, Benji
Thaddeus - nn Thad or Tad
Abigail - nn Abby
Matthew - nn Matt
What's your opinion, avoid the names, or just accept the fact that, eventhough you don't like it, everybody will call your child Penny (*yuk*) instead of the gorgeous name Penelope you loved so much.
This message was edited 9/27/2012, 1:30 AM
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Use names you love. Attempts might be made for most names, but if your child doesn't react to the nn (because they've never been called that before) or corrects the speaker himself/ herself, they won't necessarily get one.
I'm Jennifer. I wasn't called Jenny until I was almost four, and my sister was born. Susan was automatically Suzy, and my dad thought I needed a nn then too. Growing up and in college, I was one of many Jennifers called Jenny. A teacher here and there might have called me Jennifer, but it was no big deal, even if all of the others were still Jenny. My high school band teacher didn't call me Jenny until years after I graduated, which was odd. Why would you suddenly start calling someone by a nn once they were an adult? Now, I have three students named Jennifer, and they're always Jennifer, without a nn.
Out of the names you listed, the ones I know are.....
Andrew- just Andrew
James- Jim/ Jimmy, I have a future student named this but called Jimmy and Jaimito (biracial)
Joseph- Joe/ Joey
Kenneth- just one, he's Ken
Benjamin- most Ben, but there was a Benji a few years behind me in elementary school
Abigail- all Abby
Matthew- all Matthew, but my cousin is sometimes Matt. It just depends who's talking.
I'm Jennifer. I wasn't called Jenny until I was almost four, and my sister was born. Susan was automatically Suzy, and my dad thought I needed a nn then too. Growing up and in college, I was one of many Jennifers called Jenny. A teacher here and there might have called me Jennifer, but it was no big deal, even if all of the others were still Jenny. My high school band teacher didn't call me Jenny until years after I graduated, which was odd. Why would you suddenly start calling someone by a nn once they were an adult? Now, I have three students named Jennifer, and they're always Jennifer, without a nn.
Out of the names you listed, the ones I know are.....
Andrew- just Andrew
James- Jim/ Jimmy, I have a future student named this but called Jimmy and Jaimito (biracial)
Joseph- Joe/ Joey
Kenneth- just one, he's Ken
Benjamin- most Ben, but there was a Benji a few years behind me in elementary school
Abigail- all Abby
Matthew- all Matthew, but my cousin is sometimes Matt. It just depends who's talking.
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Andrew is avoidable. I know lots of Andrews. Not many go by nicknames. I know a couple who in adulthood go as Andy, but that was their own choice and I still know them as Andrew.
James is also avoidable. I know lots of guys named James, no nickname. I know one Jim and one Jimmy. The latter was legally named Jim by his parents and goes by Jimmy as a nickname. The former is a James nn Jim. Both are Irish and >60 years old. I have a neighbour named Jamie, but he's always had the option to be called James and has chosen Jamie.
Edward is also avoidable. I prefer Eddie, but I know of Edwards who have always been Edwards without a nickname.
The Ken names are reeeeally not my kind of name. I don't know any people named such, so I'm skipping.
Penny gets me too. Penelope is lovely but Penny is blargh. I know a Penelope "Poppy" who now goes as Pops. Blargh. But it's still avoidable.
I love Ada and loathe Adelaide. What's the problem? [insert troll-face here]
I also like Finn better than Finley. It's a rare case where I think the nn rolls off the tongue and whether he likes it or not, Finley shortened to Finn is kind of pal-ly and chummy and likely to happen.
Tobiah nn Toby is going to happen. I just see it. You Andrew and James nn fears were avoidable, but I can see this one happening. Tobiah is unusual whilst Andrew and James minus nns are pretty common.
James is also avoidable. I know lots of guys named James, no nickname. I know one Jim and one Jimmy. The latter was legally named Jim by his parents and goes by Jimmy as a nickname. The former is a James nn Jim. Both are Irish and >60 years old. I have a neighbour named Jamie, but he's always had the option to be called James and has chosen Jamie.
Edward is also avoidable. I prefer Eddie, but I know of Edwards who have always been Edwards without a nickname.
The Ken names are reeeeally not my kind of name. I don't know any people named such, so I'm skipping.
Penny gets me too. Penelope is lovely but Penny is blargh. I know a Penelope "Poppy" who now goes as Pops. Blargh. But it's still avoidable.
I love Ada and loathe Adelaide. What's the problem? [insert troll-face here]
I also like Finn better than Finley. It's a rare case where I think the nn rolls off the tongue and whether he likes it or not, Finley shortened to Finn is kind of pal-ly and chummy and likely to happen.
Tobiah nn Toby is going to happen. I just see it. You Andrew and James nn fears were avoidable, but I can see this one happening. Tobiah is unusual whilst Andrew and James minus nns are pretty common.
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So many! I've *ed the names that I wouldn't use because I hate the nicknames so much and they seem to be inevitable.
Nicholas but not Nick*
Alexander but not Alex*
David but not Dave
Gabriel but not Gabe
Joseph / Jonah / Jonas but not Joe
Matthew* / Matthias but not Matt
Michael* / Micah but not Mike
Jonathan but not Jon
Jacob but not Jake
Margaret but not Maggie*
Isabel but not Izzy or Belle
Alexandra but not Alex or Lexi
Charlotte but not Charlie or Lottie
Caroline but not Carrie
Victoria but not Vicky or Tori
Sophia but not Sophie*
Elizabeth but not Liz, Lizzy, or Beth
Nicholas but not Nick*
Alexander but not Alex*
David but not Dave
Gabriel but not Gabe
Joseph / Jonah / Jonas but not Joe
Matthew* / Matthias but not Matt
Michael* / Micah but not Mike
Jonathan but not Jon
Jacob but not Jake
Margaret but not Maggie*
Isabel but not Izzy or Belle
Alexandra but not Alex or Lexi
Charlotte but not Charlie or Lottie
Caroline but not Carrie
Victoria but not Vicky or Tori
Sophia but not Sophie*
Elizabeth but not Liz, Lizzy, or Beth
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Eh, if I really loved a name I'd just dedicate myself to correcting people who tried to shorten it. Being a Madyson you'd think (especially with my spelling) that people would call me Mady but I have NEVER answered to that name (save a few close relatives who called me Mady occasionally while growing up).
You have to keep in mind also though, that your child might CHOOSE to go my the NN you hate. Even with enough diligence to get everyone to NOT call Penelope Penny. She may want to go by Penny, at some point.
randome note: I really like Abigail but hate Abby AND Gail - actually I've always loved the idea of calling an Abigail "Bug" :)
You have to keep in mind also though, that your child might CHOOSE to go my the NN you hate. Even with enough diligence to get everyone to NOT call Penelope Penny. She may want to go by Penny, at some point.
randome note: I really like Abigail but hate Abby AND Gail - actually I've always loved the idea of calling an Abigail "Bug" :)
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I like Jamie for James ... he could also be Jay. James doesn't really need a nickname, so I don't know that I'd worry a lot about it.
Andy for Andrew is unavoidable IMO - I rejected the name Andrew, for which I wanted nn Drew, for my son because of that. (I had recently worked with a really conceited professor named Andy so it annoyed the living hell out of me)
Joe, Eddie, Matt, Ben, Finn, Toby, Thad are probably unavoidable.
I know a Kendrick who is called Kendrick only.
Finley could be Finley too, but not if the guy actually preferred to be called Finn.
Penelope could very easily become Nell.
Adelaide could be Della or Dede, conceivably. I don't think Adele or Alice is very likely to work.
Abigail could be Gail.
Andy for Andrew is unavoidable IMO - I rejected the name Andrew, for which I wanted nn Drew, for my son because of that. (I had recently worked with a really conceited professor named Andy so it annoyed the living hell out of me)
Joe, Eddie, Matt, Ben, Finn, Toby, Thad are probably unavoidable.
I know a Kendrick who is called Kendrick only.
Finley could be Finley too, but not if the guy actually preferred to be called Finn.
Penelope could very easily become Nell.
Adelaide could be Della or Dede, conceivably. I don't think Adele or Alice is very likely to work.
Abigail could be Gail.
This message was edited 9/27/2012, 9:33 AM
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nn's seems to unavoidable here... (Ar?)
... Since I heard a friend of my daughter calling her 'Ar' (my daughters name is Arwen)
After asking Arwen why they called her 'Ar' she told me they all use short versions of each others name, Evelien is called Ev (EE-v), Leanna is called Lee, Bella is called Bel or Be. and not just by other kids, no teachers, parents, family members, they all seem to join in.
A few years ago I noticed making names shorter and *new* nicknames was getting more common/popular (Like 'Ro' for Robert, 'Mar' for Marleen, 'Tam' for Tamara) and not just friends calling each other nicknames or relatives. No, I'm talking about classmates you hardly talk to, colleagues from another department you only know by name and function, the sister of a friends cousin you see at a birthday party once a year...
I might sound a little neurotic, but I think it's a little ridiculous, 'Ar' is something a pirate says (they really let the r role it sounded like 'Ah-rr') NOT my daughters name.
Sorry for rambling about it, just had to get it of my chest.
Greatings Ph. ;-b
... Since I heard a friend of my daughter calling her 'Ar' (my daughters name is Arwen)
After asking Arwen why they called her 'Ar' she told me they all use short versions of each others name, Evelien is called Ev (EE-v), Leanna is called Lee, Bella is called Bel or Be. and not just by other kids, no teachers, parents, family members, they all seem to join in.
A few years ago I noticed making names shorter and *new* nicknames was getting more common/popular (Like 'Ro' for Robert, 'Mar' for Marleen, 'Tam' for Tamara) and not just friends calling each other nicknames or relatives. No, I'm talking about classmates you hardly talk to, colleagues from another department you only know by name and function, the sister of a friends cousin you see at a birthday party once a year...
I might sound a little neurotic, but I think it's a little ridiculous, 'Ar' is something a pirate says (they really let the r role it sounded like 'Ah-rr') NOT my daughters name.
Sorry for rambling about it, just had to get it of my chest.
Greatings Ph. ;-b
This message was edited 9/27/2012, 11:02 AM
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Yeah I have a co-worker who just about ALWAYS refers to her daughter (Autumn) at Aut. I always think, "what a terrible NN" but I catch myself wanting to shorten names a lot too.... which is probably why I'm drawn to one-syllable names or names that have a one-syllable NN. But on the other hand, once you get use to using a full name it sort of just becomes natural. My friends names are Marybeth and Carolyn and I never even think to try to shorten them in speech. I'll sometimes refer to them as Marb and Care/Caro but I have to actually think about it first and it's usually just to abbreviate in text
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Yes! I feel the same way about Vincent. Beautiful name on its own.
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I think everyone kind of assumes every Benjamin is called Ben and every James is Jimmy or Jamie. My cousin James has never had a nickname, and we've never felt like we've had to give him one. Though I disagree of terms of preference for a few names you've mentioned the fact remains that you shouldn't give up on a name that you like just because the majority of one's you've known have gone by a nickname. If you really don't Penelope to be called Penny then don't use it, soon people will get the idea!
For example, Isaac is my top boys name, but I would never in a million years use the nicknames Zak or Izzy. He would always be Isaac and that is okay.
For example, Isaac is my top boys name, but I would never in a million years use the nicknames Zak or Izzy. He would always be Isaac and that is okay.
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I find this a pretty neurotic disctinction
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My dh is James. Just James. He has never been called anything different except by one or two older ladies who assumed he was called Jim (one of the ladies had a ds named James / Jim so I think that was why she did it). It hasn't been a problem.
I don't think those assumptions would be there unlike in the 50s, 60s or 70s. If someone called your child by a nn, they could be easily corrected.
The only exceptions I see are with Penelope (because it has four syllables and it has been my experience that the longer the name, the more likely it is to have a nn) and Benjamin and Matthew (just because Ben and Matt are in the first syllable and seem intuitive). Perhaps with Joseph and Edward though I think Ben and Matt are more likely.
I don't think those assumptions would be there unlike in the 50s, 60s or 70s. If someone called your child by a nn, they could be easily corrected.
The only exceptions I see are with Penelope (because it has four syllables and it has been my experience that the longer the name, the more likely it is to have a nn) and Benjamin and Matthew (just because Ben and Matt are in the first syllable and seem intuitive). Perhaps with Joseph and Edward though I think Ben and Matt are more likely.
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James and Andrew pretty often go by the full names. I don't think that's a big worry with those names.
Edward, Joseph and Kenneth, those seem to go by nicknames as a matter of course.
I wouldn't necessarily rule out using a name because of the nn. You can always use the full name at home, but you do have to accept that once the child grows up and has friends and goes to school, you no longer have control over what he is called by others. And he may himself decide on what he wants to be called.
Penelope is not common in the US, and it may be tricky to pronounce, and it is definitely a mouthful, so yes, you will probably have to accept that other people will call her Penny or something else less complicated. It's the risk you take choosing a long, difficult and/or unfamiliar name.
As for Adelaide, I say if you like Adele and Alice as nns, just skip Adelaide and use Adele or Alice. Frankly, the idea of using Alice, especially, as a nn for Adelaide is kind of an intellectual pretention. Alice may indeed have started out a thousand years ago as a nn for Adelaide, but it has been a full name in its own right for many centuries, and to insist on it as a nn for Adelaide seems like you are trying to show off how name-nerdy you are and how uneducated anybody is who questions your assertion that Alice is a nn for Adelaide, when the two names don't sound remotely alike.
Edward, Joseph and Kenneth, those seem to go by nicknames as a matter of course.
I wouldn't necessarily rule out using a name because of the nn. You can always use the full name at home, but you do have to accept that once the child grows up and has friends and goes to school, you no longer have control over what he is called by others. And he may himself decide on what he wants to be called.
Penelope is not common in the US, and it may be tricky to pronounce, and it is definitely a mouthful, so yes, you will probably have to accept that other people will call her Penny or something else less complicated. It's the risk you take choosing a long, difficult and/or unfamiliar name.
As for Adelaide, I say if you like Adele and Alice as nns, just skip Adelaide and use Adele or Alice. Frankly, the idea of using Alice, especially, as a nn for Adelaide is kind of an intellectual pretention. Alice may indeed have started out a thousand years ago as a nn for Adelaide, but it has been a full name in its own right for many centuries, and to insist on it as a nn for Adelaide seems like you are trying to show off how name-nerdy you are and how uneducated anybody is who questions your assertion that Alice is a nn for Adelaide, when the two names don't sound remotely alike.
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I'm sorry I have to correct you RoxStar, but using Alice as nn for Adelaide has nothing to do with intellectual pretention and I would not be trying to show off how name-nerdy I am, nor am I questioning anyones education.
But the names Adalhard & Adelheid are (very) old family names.
Various diminutives and variants have been used in the past generations (among them Alida, Alina, Aldert and many other variants)
For me the connection between Adelaide and Alice is very clear, maybe not for other people, but when people ask me about the conncection I don't think there is anything wrong with telling people it's an old family name going back several generations.
But the names Adalhard & Adelheid are (very) old family names.
Various diminutives and variants have been used in the past generations (among them Alida, Alina, Aldert and many other variants)
For me the connection between Adelaide and Alice is very clear, maybe not for other people, but when people ask me about the conncection I don't think there is anything wrong with telling people it's an old family name going back several generations.
This message was edited 9/28/2012, 3:42 AM
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James
My mom avoided using the name James for my brother because she didn't want him to be known by any nickname but honestly, I don't know a single James under the age of like 25 that goes by anything but James, and I know quite a few. I think I've met like one or two Jims and I thought that was the weirdest thing. Any Jamie I've met had Jamie as their first name. Oh I know a Jay too but that's because he's a James Jr so I think they wanted to give him a nickname.
With the exception of certain names like Elizabeth, I find that most people will generally call you by what you introduce yourself as. So I've known Jacobs that just went by Jacob and a Kathryn that just went by Kathryn, Andrews that just went by Andrew, etc. The only kids I've seen have problems are girls named Elizabeth, people seem to instinctively shorten it to Liz. I guess people shorten my name too, Kimberly, to Kim sometimes but I go by that. But I bet if I only went by Kimberly most people wouldn't. I've actually had people do the reverse, introduce myself as Kim and they'll call me Kimberly because they "like Kimberly more" which is fine by me. I don't really care either way.
I think the only times you need to worry about it is if it's really instinctive like David nn Dave, Samuel nn Sam, where the nickname is fully in the full name, and it's just the dropping of the syllables after the first.
My mom avoided using the name James for my brother because she didn't want him to be known by any nickname but honestly, I don't know a single James under the age of like 25 that goes by anything but James, and I know quite a few. I think I've met like one or two Jims and I thought that was the weirdest thing. Any Jamie I've met had Jamie as their first name. Oh I know a Jay too but that's because he's a James Jr so I think they wanted to give him a nickname.
With the exception of certain names like Elizabeth, I find that most people will generally call you by what you introduce yourself as. So I've known Jacobs that just went by Jacob and a Kathryn that just went by Kathryn, Andrews that just went by Andrew, etc. The only kids I've seen have problems are girls named Elizabeth, people seem to instinctively shorten it to Liz. I guess people shorten my name too, Kimberly, to Kim sometimes but I go by that. But I bet if I only went by Kimberly most people wouldn't. I've actually had people do the reverse, introduce myself as Kim and they'll call me Kimberly because they "like Kimberly more" which is fine by me. I don't really care either way.
I think the only times you need to worry about it is if it's really instinctive like David nn Dave, Samuel nn Sam, where the nickname is fully in the full name, and it's just the dropping of the syllables after the first.
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Yeah I've met at least 5 James that are age 25 and younger and none of them go by Jim or Jimmy or any nn. James is short enough that it doesn't need a nn plus all the James nn's are very dated sounding but James is not dated. So you are actually more likely to met a young James without a nn than you are to meet a James nn Jim or Jimmy.
I know one Andrew that doesn't go by a nn. Only the names you listed that are longer than two syllables will be harder to get away with not using a nn. All the two syllable names I wouldn't worry about.
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I know one Andrew that doesn't go by a nn. Only the names you listed that are longer than two syllables will be harder to get away with not using a nn. All the two syllable names I wouldn't worry about.
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"With the exception of certain names like Elizabeth, I find that most people will generally call you by what you introduce yourself as."
I disagree, I always introduced myself with my calling name, but it always seems to be nicknamed (either by using just the first three syllables or dropping the last two)
Both my mother and I hated this. The first wasn't even a proper nickname (like making Cri out of Cristiana) and the second was a boys name.
It's one of the reasons I don't use the name anymore.
I disagree, I always introduced myself with my calling name, but it always seems to be nicknamed (either by using just the first three syllables or dropping the last two)
Both my mother and I hated this. The first wasn't even a proper nickname (like making Cri out of Cristiana) and the second was a boys name.
It's one of the reasons I don't use the name anymore.
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Maybe it's where you're from
Because honestly, the majority of people aren't like that in my experience.
Because honestly, the majority of people aren't like that in my experience.
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Penelope is coming back, but I don't think that many little girls go by Penny these days. Nell, Nellie, Nella, Elle, Ella, and Ellie could easily be used in place of Penny. I don't think that Penny is an automatic.
Jim is also not very common for little boys these days, yet James is still popular, so yes, I think it would be possible to avoid Jim. James is a short name, so someone named James could go by his full name without trouble.
Matthew, Benjamin, Joseph, Andrew, and Abigail all have nicknames that are still popular, so it might be harder to avoid Matt, Ben, Joe / Joey, Andy (or Drew), and Abby, but there are a lot of people who go by their full names, so I think that it would be possible for them to just go by their full names all of the time.
Jim is also not very common for little boys these days, yet James is still popular, so yes, I think it would be possible to avoid Jim. James is a short name, so someone named James could go by his full name without trouble.
Matthew, Benjamin, Joseph, Andrew, and Abigail all have nicknames that are still popular, so it might be harder to avoid Matt, Ben, Joe / Joey, Andy (or Drew), and Abby, but there are a lot of people who go by their full names, so I think that it would be possible for them to just go by their full names all of the time.
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Actually I know people who are named quite a few of these who have never gone by a nn and only go by their full first name. You don't to have a nn. There is the chance that your kid might want a nn but there is also a chance that they, just like you, won't care for any of the nn's for their name.
My name had no natural nn's and my sister's name had so many possibilities. I was a little jealous that she had fun nn's and I didn't but eventually a good friend of mine gave me the nn Missa. I think if my sibling didn't have a nn I probably wouldn't have wanted one either. It just use to seem kind of unfair to me. I still loved my name but I did wish it had better lent itself for having a nn. Personally I feel if you don't want to have nn's for one child that you should choose not to have nn's for all of your children. It makes it less likely that one of them will want a nn.
Or the other option is to make certain to have nn's for all of your kids. If you are too worried that a Penelope or a Kenneth, etc might end up wanting a nn then come up with one for them that you do like. I know people who have nn's like Cricket or Tiger or Moonbeam or Moon Pie or Sugar or Pumpkin or Peaches or Cakes, etc... It doesn't have to be an animal or a food item. Come up with a fun nn for them and then call them part of the time by their name and other times by their nn.
Make certain that they know at a young age that for example you dislike Penny for Penelope. But if Penelope chooses to be called by Penny I personally wouldn't try to stop her but I probably would not call her Penny. Who cares what her friends call her. She will always be Penelope to you and maybe sometimes you'll call her little lark or whatever else you like.
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My name had no natural nn's and my sister's name had so many possibilities. I was a little jealous that she had fun nn's and I didn't but eventually a good friend of mine gave me the nn Missa. I think if my sibling didn't have a nn I probably wouldn't have wanted one either. It just use to seem kind of unfair to me. I still loved my name but I did wish it had better lent itself for having a nn. Personally I feel if you don't want to have nn's for one child that you should choose not to have nn's for all of your children. It makes it less likely that one of them will want a nn.
Or the other option is to make certain to have nn's for all of your kids. If you are too worried that a Penelope or a Kenneth, etc might end up wanting a nn then come up with one for them that you do like. I know people who have nn's like Cricket or Tiger or Moonbeam or Moon Pie or Sugar or Pumpkin or Peaches or Cakes, etc... It doesn't have to be an animal or a food item. Come up with a fun nn for them and then call them part of the time by their name and other times by their nn.
Make certain that they know at a young age that for example you dislike Penny for Penelope. But if Penelope chooses to be called by Penny I personally wouldn't try to stop her but I probably would not call her Penny. Who cares what her friends call her. She will always be Penelope to you and maybe sometimes you'll call her little lark or whatever else you like.
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This message was edited 9/27/2012, 2:34 AM
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