[Opinions] Re: Love the names, but not the nicknames
in reply to a message by Phebe
Andrew is avoidable. I know lots of Andrews. Not many go by nicknames. I know a couple who in adulthood go as Andy, but that was their own choice and I still know them as Andrew.
James is also avoidable. I know lots of guys named James, no nickname. I know one Jim and one Jimmy. The latter was legally named Jim by his parents and goes by Jimmy as a nickname. The former is a James nn Jim. Both are Irish and >60 years old. I have a neighbour named Jamie, but he's always had the option to be called James and has chosen Jamie.
Edward is also avoidable. I prefer Eddie, but I know of Edwards who have always been Edwards without a nickname.
The Ken names are reeeeally not my kind of name. I don't know any people named such, so I'm skipping.
Penny gets me too. Penelope is lovely but Penny is blargh. I know a Penelope "Poppy" who now goes as Pops. Blargh. But it's still avoidable.
I love Ada and loathe Adelaide. What's the problem? [insert troll-face here]
I also like Finn better than Finley. It's a rare case where I think the nn rolls off the tongue and whether he likes it or not, Finley shortened to Finn is kind of pal-ly and chummy and likely to happen.
Tobiah nn Toby is going to happen. I just see it. You Andrew and James nn fears were avoidable, but I can see this one happening. Tobiah is unusual whilst Andrew and James minus nns are pretty common.
All the Benjamins and Benedicts I know have gone by Ben. They like it, I like it. I know none of them who would subject themselves to Benji.
Thad and Tad are gross. I don't know anyone called Thaddeus, but I think you could aviod it.
Abigail is one of my most hated girls' names. Sorry. Not going there.
Most Matthews I know are called Matt. I don't like Matt, but Matt and Mattie are so common I'm not sure whether people would automatically call a Matthew "Matt".
I think nicknames are unavoidable. I love nicknames. I have a name - Artemisia - that has no natural nickname. My parents didn’t choose it for that reason but they liked that it had no nickname attached to it, whilst I grew up to desperately want one. As it turned out, I ended up fobbing off people who wanted to call me Artie and being called Mis or Misa by my folks, because it turns out shortening names happens whether you want it or not. When I was young I would have loved to have been an Elizabeth "Liz" or something.
Also, in terms of nicknames, is it really your decision? I know loads of people who have nicknames their parents call them which they hate - Elizabeths who hate the "Lizzie" their parents use and want to be known as "Beth" and Samuels who are Samuels to everyone but "Sam" to their folks. If you use the name on a kid and they want a nickname from it, they'll use it. If they don't, they'll say so. If you name your (theoretical) daughter Penelope, and she wants to be called Penny, she'll be called Penny. If she doesn't and people try to call her Penny, she'll tell them so
I'd say go with the names you like. Nicknames will happen whether you want them to or not, or they might not... and really, it's not what you want, but what your child wants. If you have a baby James who grows up and wants to be known as the nickname Jimmy, that's his choice, not yours. You might not like it at first but you might find yourself liking it. The truly silly thing would be choosing a name you don't love as opposed to your favourites because you know it has no nickname.... and then your child Ian grows up to be known as One-Eyed Steve. Ian has no name nickname but he picked one up anyhow. Y'know? It happens. So really, I think you have to go with it. Take the names you like, try to fend of nicknames you don't like, and if they are used and your child likes them, live with it.
James is also avoidable. I know lots of guys named James, no nickname. I know one Jim and one Jimmy. The latter was legally named Jim by his parents and goes by Jimmy as a nickname. The former is a James nn Jim. Both are Irish and >60 years old. I have a neighbour named Jamie, but he's always had the option to be called James and has chosen Jamie.
Edward is also avoidable. I prefer Eddie, but I know of Edwards who have always been Edwards without a nickname.
The Ken names are reeeeally not my kind of name. I don't know any people named such, so I'm skipping.
Penny gets me too. Penelope is lovely but Penny is blargh. I know a Penelope "Poppy" who now goes as Pops. Blargh. But it's still avoidable.
I love Ada and loathe Adelaide. What's the problem? [insert troll-face here]
I also like Finn better than Finley. It's a rare case where I think the nn rolls off the tongue and whether he likes it or not, Finley shortened to Finn is kind of pal-ly and chummy and likely to happen.
Tobiah nn Toby is going to happen. I just see it. You Andrew and James nn fears were avoidable, but I can see this one happening. Tobiah is unusual whilst Andrew and James minus nns are pretty common.
All the Benjamins and Benedicts I know have gone by Ben. They like it, I like it. I know none of them who would subject themselves to Benji.
Thad and Tad are gross. I don't know anyone called Thaddeus, but I think you could aviod it.
Abigail is one of my most hated girls' names. Sorry. Not going there.
Most Matthews I know are called Matt. I don't like Matt, but Matt and Mattie are so common I'm not sure whether people would automatically call a Matthew "Matt".
I think nicknames are unavoidable. I love nicknames. I have a name - Artemisia - that has no natural nickname. My parents didn’t choose it for that reason but they liked that it had no nickname attached to it, whilst I grew up to desperately want one. As it turned out, I ended up fobbing off people who wanted to call me Artie and being called Mis or Misa by my folks, because it turns out shortening names happens whether you want it or not. When I was young I would have loved to have been an Elizabeth "Liz" or something.
Also, in terms of nicknames, is it really your decision? I know loads of people who have nicknames their parents call them which they hate - Elizabeths who hate the "Lizzie" their parents use and want to be known as "Beth" and Samuels who are Samuels to everyone but "Sam" to their folks. If you use the name on a kid and they want a nickname from it, they'll use it. If they don't, they'll say so. If you name your (theoretical) daughter Penelope, and she wants to be called Penny, she'll be called Penny. If she doesn't and people try to call her Penny, she'll tell them so
I'd say go with the names you like. Nicknames will happen whether you want them to or not, or they might not... and really, it's not what you want, but what your child wants. If you have a baby James who grows up and wants to be known as the nickname Jimmy, that's his choice, not yours. You might not like it at first but you might find yourself liking it. The truly silly thing would be choosing a name you don't love as opposed to your favourites because you know it has no nickname.... and then your child Ian grows up to be known as One-Eyed Steve. Ian has no name nickname but he picked one up anyhow. Y'know? It happens. So really, I think you have to go with it. Take the names you like, try to fend of nicknames you don't like, and if they are used and your child likes them, live with it.