New Post
Search
Help[Opinions] Re: Stop gendering children through names!
in reply to a message by )(
I think it's ok to use gendered names, because I don't think gender is the bad guy. I just wish there was more curiosity and flexibility about it.
I know of people who gave their children unisex names, but the kids still grew up to pick new names for themselves if they changed gender. I guess you could say that a unisex name is more of a blank slate, but it doesn't erase the need for a person to explore their own identity, which is often difficult and complex. I see what you are saying, and highly gendered names could definitely be an issue for some, but I am not convinced that purposefully picking a genderless name for everyone would be like a magic wand solving everything, you know? If a child's parents are the sort that will be supportive and kind, they will probably be supportive no matter what they name their child. "Gender" itself isn't the enemy so there's really nothing wrong with choosing a gendered name at first, if you like the name.
That's the thing I can't seem to get my head around with gender stuff - if we agree that it's not bad to be female, or male, or gender fluid, or anything, then why is it bad to play with and acknowledge gendered stuff?? If it would be ok for Roy to say they are a Rosalie, then Rosalie was always ok even if they are clearly gendered. Does that make sense? It's still kind of fuzzy for me but I think that's the way I feel about it.
I like a lot of surname names, and nature names. I think Onyx is a cool unisex idea, for example. Wren should be unisex, I don't know why it isn't. Aspen, River, Jasper, Robin, all so cute.
I know of people who gave their children unisex names, but the kids still grew up to pick new names for themselves if they changed gender. I guess you could say that a unisex name is more of a blank slate, but it doesn't erase the need for a person to explore their own identity, which is often difficult and complex. I see what you are saying, and highly gendered names could definitely be an issue for some, but I am not convinced that purposefully picking a genderless name for everyone would be like a magic wand solving everything, you know? If a child's parents are the sort that will be supportive and kind, they will probably be supportive no matter what they name their child. "Gender" itself isn't the enemy so there's really nothing wrong with choosing a gendered name at first, if you like the name.
That's the thing I can't seem to get my head around with gender stuff - if we agree that it's not bad to be female, or male, or gender fluid, or anything, then why is it bad to play with and acknowledge gendered stuff?? If it would be ok for Roy to say they are a Rosalie, then Rosalie was always ok even if they are clearly gendered. Does that make sense? It's still kind of fuzzy for me but I think that's the way I feel about it.
I like a lot of surname names, and nature names. I think Onyx is a cool unisex idea, for example. Wren should be unisex, I don't know why it isn't. Aspen, River, Jasper, Robin, all so cute.
Replies
I know exactly what you mean. I just want to know what people think when it comes to this. I worked with a Katharine who was on the LGBTQIA2S+ spectrum and she went by Kay, hating Katharine it being so feminine.
Ah, ok!
I think Kay as a more gender flexible name is a cool idea, I like that.
I think Kay as a more gender flexible name is a cool idea, I like that.
Agree with all of this.